"Everything I have to look forward to...

...has a pretty painful and very imposing before..."

I find myself at a threshold in my life. I could call it a crossroads, as some people do, but I see the path one takes through life less as a single track with a few forks and more as a constantly forking path with a few straight shots. So here I am on the cusp of doing something very different. I am standing on the precipice looking into the abyss and the abyss is looking into me and I... can't... breathe...

To be specific, my husband has finished classes for his MBA (congratulations are in order and duly given,) and is commencing looking for a new job in a new area. I really can't tell you how proud of him I am, and how unreal it is to be finished with the first step of the escape plan. That step was long, grueling and in all other ways really fracking hard, and I have no delusions about the subsequent steps being any easier. But seemingly endless though it was, it was not unendurable. I say this to steel myself against what's coming up ahead.

Next we have the job hunt, which for me is cake. I just need to shut up and stay out of the way. But the kicker is going to be selling the house. This involves some minor repairs and presumably a major slap in the face. I have heretofore skirted the issue of my parents on my blog and I'm not about to get into it now, so suffice it to say that my mother likes to be in control. She had therefore an interest in preventing me from getting married, and now has a similar interest in preventing me from leaving the state. I'm not going to go into details, but believe me when I say that she is capable of unbelievable selfishness and will attempt to drag the whole family into a war before she will accept a decision of mine with a little grace. But as I am more concerned about wasting my life in a warehouse in Hell, TN than I am about her good opinion, I am preparing for a fight.


As far as where we'll end up, I'm not really sure, and frankly I don't care too much. The important part to me is that I am on the edge of an adventure. Getting rid of all of the stuff that I don't use/don't want to move/don't want to store/don't need makes me feel like a toddler shedding my clothes and running into the ocean. If they don't catch me and make me get dressed again, I'll get sunburned, but this is a liberation and determination unlike any I've felt before.